


Mind is Running in Circles of You and Me

by Louksana



Category: Bohemian Rhapsody (Movie 2018), Queen (Band)
Genre: (Freddie and Brian will appear later on), A LOT of Angst, Also fluff, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Emotional Abuse, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, Homophobia, John is not comfortable with his body, M/M, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-03-05
Updated: 2019-10-15
Packaged: 2019-11-12 10:21:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 16,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18009125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Louksana/pseuds/Louksana
Summary: John and Roger are high school students. They've known each other for a few months already and have been together for a couple of months now, both enjoying their still fresh relationship.Obviously, life is not only about love and having to go to class, and the two of them have to face the bad side of it.John has to keep going and act as his mother wants him to and Roger has to cope with witnessing his boyfriend struggling.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hello!  
> Here I am with a new fic! This one was meant to be a happy basic schoolfic rather than a complicated one, but well I ended up writing angst, oops?  
> ... Which means if you're not comfortable with angst, emotional abuse, and this kind of stuff, please don't hurt yourself reading this.  
> Also, I want it to be obvious that I took the Queen members and their families, but I am in no way going to picture them as they 'really' are irl (well, they'll obviously have part of their irl personalities and such kind of things but yeah). I'm mostly saying this for John's mother, I'm definitely not picturing real Mrs Deacon, I wanted to make sure you know that.  
> Anyway, I hope you'll like it!

A hand gripped his wrist and he quietly let himself be led a few steps away from the main and crowded corridor.

"Hey you," a comforting voice said, before lips were pressing against his own, "I thought I wasn't going to see you today," the boy continued, now with a pouty face.

The younger one smiled, "Hi Rog, I'm sorry I didn't find you at lunch break, where were you?"

"Oh, yeah I went out with friends, but then you weren't there for the whole day long, were you hiding from me?"

"No," John chuckled, "I had to meet one of my teachers during this morning's break, that's why you didn't see me," he explained, leaning a bit into his boyfriend's embrace.

A few students passed them but didn't really pay attention, they were known to be discreet.

"And you didn't even text me," Roger tried to blame him, but his soft voice betrayed him.

"You know it's forbidden inside the buildings. Well, you know, you just don't obey the rules here, or anywhere really," the younger one said, rolling his eyes.

"Hey! Rules are made to be broken, you should try a bit and see it's all fine! Plus, I know you like it!"

"Breaking the rules?"

"No, me doing so," Roger told him with a big smile lightening his face.

John could not help but blush a little, his body felt suddenly warm and, well, good. He shook his head disapprovingly, but the grin he couldn't hold back betrayed him too. He let the blond boy kiss him again, a little longer this time, and put a hand on his cheek, brushing it softly.

"Boys, I'm not gonna tell you once more," a voice warned them, both of them took a step away from each other, "you know it's not accepted here," the man continued. He was not much older than them, he was still a student too -at uni-, but he worked as a monitor three days of each week. The two boys liked him, he was fun and kind, but he still had to make them respect the school law. "I think I already told you this many times now, you should've learned that if you want to do share a little privacy, you have to find another place. Oh, and Roger, by another place I don't mean hiding in various parts of the building, you're lucky it was me who found you."

Roger rolled his eyes naughtily, "fine," he said, "we'll stop, then."

The monitor nodded and shot them a warning finger before walking away. The boys watched him go until he disappeared behind the corner, and John took the opportunity to grab Roger's waist and kiss him again. The blond obviously didn't reject him and put his arms around him.

"Boys! Oh my god, we really can't let you alone for one minute."

John stepped away once again, now blushing a little harder, "uh sorry," he said, looking down at his feet with embarrassment.

The monitor shook his head and smiled a little before leaving for real this time.

"See, you're also a rule breaker yourself," Roger said to his boyfriend, a little mockingly. He only received a pout in return. "Oh no, don't make that face, let's go and find a quiet place before the end of the break so I can kiss a smile back on your face."

The older one took the brunet's hand and led him for a while until he found a free corner without many students or teachers passing by. He settled John against the wall and they started making out again, until the bell rang again. The younger boy put his hands on Roger's chest in order to push him away but this didn't quite work.

"Rog we have to go to class," he said in between two kisses, "you know my mom will kill me if she knows I skipped." He didn't want to let go but he pushed his boyfriend a little harder until the latter surrendered.

"Fine, but please meet me before going home," the older one said with puppy eyes.

John shook his head with amusement, he just loved this boy so much he couldn't even believe it. "Or you can go home with me, my mom won't be home tonight, so we're free to do whatever we want."

"What do you want us to do then?" Roger asked, attentively gazing at John.

"Hm, I'm sure we'll figure it out, now just let me go to class, and you should go too," the younger one said, stealing a last kiss before disappearing behind a wall.

Roger sighed, he didn't know if it was a sigh of disappointment because he would have wanted more time with his boyfriend, or a sigh full of his love for him. He put his fingers on his cheeks for a moment, now very impatient to finish with today's classes. He quickly sent his mom a text to ask if he could sleep at a friend's tonight because they had some work to do and went for his next class.

 

\- - -

 

When he got out of class, Roger checked his phone again, he hated Mr Benson because he had confiscated his phone twice already, so he couldn't use it in class anymore, at least not with him as his teacher. He bit his bottom lip as he read a text from his mom, she wanted to call him when he was out of school. He walked out of the building and quickly sent a text to his boyfriend to tell him where he would be waiting for him, and then called his mom. She picked up a moment later.

"Hello dear, how was your day?"

"Fine, I had biology earlier so it was great," he said thoughtfully.

"Oh yeah, so where do you want to go tonight exactly?"

"Oh, to John's. You know, you met him already."

"Fine dear, but I thought you weren't in the same class, how come you have to work together."

Roger opened his mouth and closed it again. He always thought the best part of good lies was that there was at least a good part of truth, and by telling his mom exactly where he went, he had hoped she would not have been questioning him. But he forgot about the work together part.

"Uhh, yeah but he has this biology work to do and I thought I could help him with it…?" he finally answered, hoping to sound a least a little confident.

"Hmm... Should I call his mom to make sure it's all fine?"

Roger's face went pale in a matter of seconds, "no! I mean, no, mom, it's all fine, she's fine with it, please don't call her."

"Roger dear," she started, "you know it's only out of politeness, right?"

"But mom, it's so embarrassing, please don't, I'll manage with the whole politeness thing," he said, a little desperately.

"Alright, but keep me updated okay?"

"Fine..." he almost whispered. His smile came back on his lips when he saw John approaching. "So, can I go?"

"Yes dear, but please behave well."

"I will," he said with a rather annoyed voice, "bye mom, love you." He hung up before she could talk back and smiled again, the grin directed to his boyfriend this time. "Hey."

"So can you come?" the brunet asked, stopping next to him.

Roger nodded hard and smiled even brighter, which made John grin too. They started heading to the younger one's home. Roger had been there once only, and he was kinda glad that the boy's mother wouldn't be here, he was a little scared of her, in all honesty. With his mom, it was different, she didn't mind him bringing friends home, and she liked to get to know them. John's mom was more aloof, but she still cared very much about her son. Not the same way Roger's mom did though. From what he knew, John's mother mainly cared about his grades, his behaviour and his health, not really about him or his general well-being; when his own mother cared about every part of his life. Even the parts he didn't want her to stick her nose in. He still managed to keep him and John's being together a secret, not that he feared his mom wouldn't like it, but because he liked his little intimacy. He knew it was different for the brunet though. He knew the younger boy would never tell his mom, and Roger tried not to question it too much, he just accepted it.

 

They arrived at John's small house after taking the bus for a while.

"Just please, get off your shoes in the entrance, my mom would kill me if she found one trace of dirt," John chuckled when he pushed the door open, but Roger felt like he wasn't really joking so he nodded and did as the younger boy said. He also took off his jacket that the brunet hanged, putting his own on top of it. The blond followed his boyfriend to the kitchen. "Are you hungry?"

Roger shrugged and watched the younger boy searching the cupboard before getting them a pack of cookies, and then served them some apple juice. They went upstairs to John's room next. The house was not very big, the top floor only had John's bedroom and the bathroom, his mom would sleep downstairs as her room was next to the tiny living room.

They sat on the bed and started eating their cookies, talking about their days and a new series Roger had discovered, so they ended up watching the first two episodes, cuddled into John's bed.

When they turned the laptop off, they cuddled more closely, now also kissing softly. Roger was brushing the younger boy's short and fluffy hair while playing with his lips, adoring the moment. They didn't really have many moments alone. The only situations they found time to be close enough was at school, but even there it was complicated since it was forbidden to demonstrate affection inside the buildings. They couldn't really invite each other either, or their parents would obviously have every chance of finding out about them. They only occasionally went out, but if Roger's mother often said she was okay with it -mostly because the blond wouldn't have it any other way-, John's mother was far stricter about the brunet's outing.

John finally shifted and propped himself on his elbows, looking at his boyfriend with heart eyes, a content smile on his lips.

"What?" Roger asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Nothing, I just wanted to look at you."

"You're such a..." the blond started, searching for the good words, but he couldn't find them, "oh my god I can't believe how innocent you are."

"I know you love me because of this, don't play offended," John chuckled, heading his hand to his boyfriend's to play with his fingers.

"Right, you got me, I surrender..." The older boy said, putting his free hand in the air and shrugging.

John laughed a bit more frankly and leaned toward him to steal another kiss. The blond gripped his shirt and pulled him against his chest again in order to get him closer. They shared a soft kiss that turned into a warmer one and Roger turned to his side when he felt himself getting hard from it.

"What are you doing?" John mumbled, letting himself lay down again.

"Nothing, just getting myself comfy," the older boy said, shrugging lightly, hoping John wouldn't find his suddenly deeper voice weird, "why are you asking?"

The brunet shrugged too and kissed him again, throwing an arm around his boyfriend. Roger kissed him slowly, trying to gently restrain the power the kissing session had on his body, but somehow John thought it was a great idea to deepen the kiss and play with his tongue. The blond got a little lost into it and fought his own will to break the kiss. John groaned a bit.

"Now what's wrong? You're really acting weird."

Roger shook his head, "no I'm all fine, more than fine actually."

"Okay...?" the younger one said, a little confused, "did I do something wrong?"

The blond giggled, "John babe, you absolutely did nothing wrong, far from it actually."

"Then what is it?" the brunet said, absolutely clueless, "please tell me, even if I don't like it. You know how much I hate it when you're hiding things from me."

"You sound like I'm hiding a million things from you!" the blonde complained, but he softened quickly enough and let his temple rest against the pillow again, his eyes flickering, "well, you're just a little too attractive."

"What do you mean?" John asked, arching an eyebrow in pure confusion.

The older boy inhaled, searching how to put this into a great explanation, "uhm, you know, I love you and... My hormones also love you and react to you, you know..." he tried, wincing and squinting a little, hoping his boyfriend would not get afraid. They never quite talked about it and he knew John was very self-conscious with his body.

Roger could see the boy thinking hard, and his face got suddenly flushed with redness as he finally understood what he'd just said. The brunet even looked down just to check if he got this right and the sight of the older deformed tight trousers confirmed it.

"Oh," he just said, almost as a whisper. He looked back at his boyfriend's face, first avoiding his gaze, noticing Roger's cheek also were a soft tone of pink and he found it so very cute he got the courage to look at him in the eye. "Yeah... uhm... What should I do?"

The blond bit his bottom lip and John thought it was the most innocent face he had ever seen on him, so the latter thought he was the one meant to unblock the situation.

"I mean, maybe I can try to touch you, if you want...?" he tried shyly, "I guess you want me to do something, you wouldn't be... Uhm... You know... If you didn't expect me to try anything."

Roger could feel his face turning into a real shade of red this time, "baby we don't have to do this if we're not both comfortable with it."

John closed his eyes for a moment, his boyfriend only rarely used pet names but he actually really liked it now he was thinking about it. He opened his eyes again and tried to sound confident, "no, I think I'm fine with it."

The blonde watched him carefully and smiled a little, pulling him against himself once more and kissing the corner of his lips. They started making out again for a little while until John moaned shyly.

"Now I think you'd like something more too," Roger said quietly, skimming his cheek with his fingers.

John couldn't deny it and blushed even harder if it was possible, escaping his boyfriend's gaze. He wasn't gonna lie and say he never thought of it at least a little. He wouldn't have been able to avoid it since teenage years were when everyone started constantly talking about that. He hid his head against the blonde's collar bone and clutched at his back. The older boy thought it meant he could go on, so he started by putting his fingers down John's shirt top button and undoing it, but a hand stopped him as soon as he reached the second one. He frowned slightly and let his boyfriend move apart a little.

"I'm not really sure about the whole 'get naked' stuff," he said desperately, looking so ashamed of telling Roger this.

The blond nodded after a moment and thought hard about what to do next before talking again: "Sure babe, it's all fine. You do want us to please each other, don't you?"

The younger boy nodded shyly, "b-but please don't... Look at me," he stuttered.

"As much as I'd love to see your body, I won't do it if you don't want to okay?" He waited for the brunet to nod before he talked again, "look I may have an idea that would work without you being afraid of me seeing you, do you want to try it?" he asked, waiting for John to shoot him a confused look, "I thought we could either turn the lights off or only remove our pants, and then we'll figure out...?"

The younger one nodded and got up so quickly that Roger was almost startled because of his sudden move. They were soon enough in the dark, the only light coming from the moon and street lamps outside, but not enough so they could really see each other. In fact, they could only barely see each other's silhouette and the reflection in their eyes. John came back onto the bed and Roger could only see -well, mostly hear him and feel the movement of the mattress- him struggling with his trousers for a while before he did the same with his. Before he could even think, John got on top of him and kissed him again, then settling on the top of his legs. The blond put his hands on the younger boy's thighs, but he only felt the soft and warm skin for a second before John gripped his fingers to hold them away. He felt a little frustrated because he felt the urge to touch his boyfriend, but he tried to concentrate on the fact that he was actually in bed with John and they were going to have sex, which, to be honest, almost made him come straight away. He moved a little, aching for the brunette's touch on him.

"Uhm Rog?" John suddenly whispered.

"Yeah?" the older one said, realising his boyfriend was still holding his hands into an awkward position in the air.

"Uhm... What should we do now?"

"I guess... Let me touch you?" Roger tried carefully.

"No," the brunet said, a little too hastily for Roger's sake, "I mean... I'm not sure I want to do this that way...?"

"How do you want to do it then?" the blond asked, he was the confused one now.

"Uhm... Let me try something, would you?"

Roger shrugged, "okay?" he said, now a little impatient and caught in anticipation. He wasn't very certain of what to expect.

He was answered promptly as John brushed his bulge against him, causing him to shiver from head to toes, he almost gasped when the younger boy pressed a little more frankly against him, finally letting go of his hands. Roger didn't really know what to do with them now, as he knew the brunet wouldn't like it if he tried to touch him again, so he just let them fall flat on the bed at first. Then John leaned a little more forward to kiss him, allowing them to really feel each other even through their underwear. This time Roger couldn't help but gasp for real, and the sudden sound was echoed by John's innocent moan. The blond didn't even remember throwing his arms around him, but this time the younger boy didn't seem to mind. The blond arched his back a little to be able to feel him more, his arousal now more than noticeable. He then managed to get them on their sides so he was more able to rub himself against John's now slightly wet underwear, and the brunet responded with the same kind of movement, getting him to almost hiss in pleasure; now that was way more enjoyable that masturbating all alone while watching some porn video. Their moves got a little stronger, and when Roger heard his name in his boyfriend's mouth, he at first thought he did something wrong, but then John shivered so hard against him and he suddenly felt some warmth spreading against his cock. He was almost holding his breath in when he let go of himself, closing his eyes hard as the waves of an orgasm got him almost by surprise.

They were both panting when Roger opened his eyes again. He met John's eyes, or what he could see of them, and he was astonished by how much emotion he could read in them. He smiled a little and stroke his cheek, feeling his boyfriend's legs brushing against his softly. Since he wasn't able to touch him as he would have loved to, he tried to concentrate on how his bare skin felt against John's, and it felt so amazing.

They did not talk for a while, only appreciating the calm and content atmosphere, letting their breaths settle down to normal, Roger drawing some circles against the brunette's shoulder blades topped by his shirt. They kissed softly. Probably the softest one they ever shared. And it was amazing.

They only got up a while after, Roger went straight to the bathroom and John changed his underwear, put his pants on again and went downstairs so he could cook some pasta. He was biting his lips during the whole time he put water in a saucepan and waited for it to boil. He almost jumped out of his skin when the water overflowed, he inhaled, god he was too much in his own mind. He put the pasta to cook, looked for the time and set the table. He wasn't even thinking about anything. Actually, it felt like his brain was empty, but in a good way. His body also felt relaxed.

"What did they do?" Roger asked when he walked in the tiny kitchen.

"Who?" the brunet asked, filling their glasses.

"Your lips, they look like they're going to split from you biting them," the oldest one said, stopping a step away from him.

John wanted to answer, but when he looked up he was met by Roger's bare torso since the blond apparently didn't felt the need to button up his shirt. He blushed a little, he was a little jealous of how his boyfriend seemed to be comfortable with himself enough to show more skin than necessary to the world, but at the same time, since they were alone right now and no one but him got to see that, he was not going to complain.

"Appreciating the view?" Roger asked cheekily enough.

"Shut up," the brunet said, shoving him a little but with an intentional lack of strength, "yes."

The blond chuckled and kissed his cheek, "look, I know you probably won't agree, but I'm sure you're just as handsome."

John rolled his eyes and still leaned a bit into him before he went to get the pasta. "Sit down and stop talking nonsense"

"Alright, alright... I'm sure you'll be proved wrong the day I get to see you, though," Roger replied, watching him attentively just to see the way the other boy slightly shut down. He definitely didn't say that to embarrass him, so he continued, "when you're ready obviously."

John said nothing to ease the silence that settled afterwards and served them approximately equally. He sat down and finally looked up at Roger.

"Look I know you're probably dying to see me, but I just don't get why, I'm not that special."

The blond smiled a little in response, "John, if you weren't at least a little special to me I wouldn't be your boyfriend."

The younger one blinked a little, okay, that felt very rational. He could trust Roger about that, he thought, but he still wasn't going to strip for him in a minute. Or in a day. Or probably not in a week, he couldn't even imagine it. He felt like shit about it actually. He didn't even have a real reason to hide like that. He'd heard stories about people having complexes for good reasons, but he didn't feel like he had those exact reasons. He just didn't feel right in his body, especially since puberty kicked in. Okay, maybe it could be the bullies a few years ago who liked to tell him he looked like shit when his mom was still choosing his clothes -and he couldn't really blame her for that. It probably played a role into all of this, actually. But then, even if he had felt better when he got to actually choose the way he wanted to dress, he still wasn't going to be comfortable with people looking at him. He hated to be so insecure when Roger obviously didn't understand that, even though, thankfully enough, his boyfriend never would force him into anything he didn't want to do. Apart from breaking some laws, but to be honest, John had grown to like it a little bit. It felt good not to have any limits sometimes.

They ate in silence until Roger started to talk about a presentation he had to work on for next week, and John tried to give him a few ideas to make it even better. All awkwardness had flown away. John took a shower before going to sleep and they cuddled quietly until both of them fell asleep.

 

\- - -

 

"Now this is utterly disrespectful!"

John startled out of sleep the second he heard his mother's voice and propped himself up, still a little lost. There was light coming from outside so he only had time to figure it was the morning already, but probably early enough because his alarm clock hadn't rung yet.

"First you invite him home without telling me, and now I find you both..."

He could only see his mother wince before doing the same himself, for another reason though. He shook Roger's shoulder since the blond didn't have seemed to surface yet.

"Mom it's-"

"I don't want to hear whatever excuse you make up, you, get out of here," she spat.

That's when John realized his boyfriend had time to wake up and grasp the situation because he got up rather quickly and put his pants on, "sorry Mrs Deacon, I didn't mean to bother," he squeaked.

"You should have thought about it before coming here and getting my son to this kind of practices," she replied, her voice full of hate, so Roger didn't take more time to grab his things and stuff it clumsily into his backpack. He glanced at John who looked absolutely terrified right now, and he wished he had the courage to stand up to them, but the look on Mrs Deacon's face made him think it was better for both of them that he left now.

He almost ran down the stairs only to hear the woman tell her son that no, he wasn't going to follow him because they had to talk it out, and Roger wanted to cry because if he felt so scared right now, he couldn't even begin to imagine how John must feel. He put his shoes on as quick as he could and got out. He looked up to John's window but nothing told him what was going on inside of the room now. He inhaled shakily, and as much as he definitely wasn't a believer, he prayed for John to be alright.

He walked a little and sat down on a bench when he felt far enough from here. That's when he realized he had no idea what time it was. His phone said 6:37. He winced, his body felt sore from so much stress.

He sent John a text.

 

John didn't reply.

He wasn't even at school that day.

When he asked Liam, the kind monitor, about it, the man told him his mom had called to tell them he was sick. Roger didn't feel like complaining, he didn't want to talk about any of it. He just hoped John was safe and he was jumping to conclusions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi, it's me again,  
> So here was my first chapter, I'd love to know what you thought about it? Also I'd love to read what you believe is going to happen next!  
> Please feel free to come and have a talk with me :)


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello there!  
> I'm back with chapter 2, I hope you like it, things start getting a little rough from here. Let the angst begin properly ;)  
> I'd love to hear about your opinion of that fic, so please join me in the comment section :p  
> Have a good day/night everyone!

He was proven wrong the next Monday. He hadn't been able to contact John for the whole weekend and it had been killing him. No one knew about what happened, though his mum assumed something was wrong with him since she tried to talk to him. Roger talked about anything but what really happened, hoping she would drop it.

School felt empty without John, he'd been searching for his face the whole day. His phone was empty of John's messages, cute texts, funny gifs. His heart felt even emptier.

He even imagined seeing John's hair when he got to class after lunch. He had some friends in his class, but not the kind of friends that would understand, so he just tried to play it cool. He tried not to think about this too much, but when he reminded himself about this, he felt so bad for John, because that was so egotistical of him to ignore all of this and let his boyfriend deal with everything.

 

 

He was sat on a step of the stairs outside, the one on the far left side of the building, smoking a cigarette in secret. The school prohibited such things, but he'd felt like he needed it. He was scrolling through twitter when someone called his name. He went to throw his cigarette away but he recognized John before doing so. He stood up right away and went straight to him. The brunet got right into his arms and they both sighed shakily.

"I didn't know you were here," Roger started, holding him close.

"Sorry I couldn't tell you..." John replied, his head buried in his boyfriend's neck, "plus I've been forbidden to see you..."

"Your mom?" the blond asked, pushing John a little to be able to see his face, and the expression on it confirmed what he was thinking. His anger came back again, he suddenly wanted to punch someone, but the sad look in his boyfriend's eyes mostly made him sad.

"She took my phone, that's why I couldn't reach you..." the brunet sighed, "I just hope she won't delete everything."

Roger knew how much John cared about the pictures they had together or the texts they shared, so he hoped she wouldn't. He held him tight again, closing his eyes and putting his chin on top of his shoulder.

"What are we gonna do?" the blond said quietly, and he felt John shrug.

They parted a little and Roger took a puff of his cigarette. Surprisingly enough, the younger one took it and inhaled a few puffs too. The blond didn't feel like telling him not to do that, because after all, he wasn't the best adviser here. So he took John's hand and played with his fingers.

"You don't have class?" the blond asked.

"I do, but I saw you back there and I followed you. I'll tell them I felt sick, since that's what my mom told them."

"Don't get yourself in trouble, John..."

The brunet chuckled sadly, "too late."

"I mean it," Roger told him, all serious now.

"I know you do, I just don't want to leave you yet."

They both looked at each other with pained expressions. John saw some sparkle increasing in his boyfriend's eyes so he raised an eyebrow at him. The blond walked back to his backpack and took his tablet out of it.

"Take this, so we can talk together tonight, just log into your twitter account or anything. You still have access to the wifi don't you?"

John looked at him in pure astonishment, "Rog I can't take your tablet."

"Yes you can, and you will."

"What if she finds out?" he said, more than a little freaked out in Roger's opinion.

"I know you'll find a way so she doesn't. Please," the blond asked with puppy eyes John couldn't say no to.

"Okay... I hope she won't notice..."

John took the device and put it in his bag. He was already ten minutes late to his next class. He sighed and threw his arms around his boyfriend one last time and finally settled to kiss him softly. He unfortunately had to go right after.

"Take care of yourself," the blond said when John went back into the building, sending him a kiss before the door shut.

  

\- - -

 

Later that day, Roger ate with his parents. He felt a little better, he didn't feel like he was leaving John completely on his own now. His mom noticed, obviously. Even his dad did. But his mom was the one teasing him about it.

"Mooom, stop it... I told you, nothing is going on," the blond said for the hundredth time, probably.

"Let him be," his dad finally said, "you know how we were at his age."

"Thank you," Roger emphasized, giving his mom big round eyes just to make sure she understood.

He didn't always get on well with his father, especially now that he was growing up and some tensions found their way between them, but he was still his dad. And sometimes his dad would be his best accomplice. Most of the time the opposite, in his opinion. But he didn't know many people his age who never argued with their parents.

Thinking about it, he never heard John talk about his father. Roger assumed he didn't live with them, but he just didn't know a thing about him. He'd been together with John for 3 months now, so he'd expect the brunet to talk about it if anything had happened recently. Roger pursed his lips, maybe he'd have the opportunity to ask John about it.

He moved to the sofa along with his parents, they were watching some series but Roger was mostly on his phone. He hadn't noticed yet, but that's when he opened his twitter DMs that a message he didn't get any notification from appeared. It was from an account he didn't know. He opened it only to read "Rog it's John, I thought it was a better idea to create a new account since mine is linked to my phone and if my mom sees them she'll figure out".

Roger didn't know if he was proud of his boyfriend being so smart, or if it actually scared him even more. He saw the message was sent about an hour ago and he felt like shit for not noticing sooner.

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Sorry I didn't get the notif :(

I hope you're fine I miss you

 

He went back to scrolling, and he couldn't help but hope that John's mom hadn't found the tablet, or many other terrible scenarios that probably wouldn't even happen in any way. It felt like an eternity -but was only about ten minutes- before the blond got a reply.

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

I'm fine

Sorry I stole your original name lol

I couldn't find another one

Don't be mad :c

 

Roger replied right away, a flow of relief running through his whole body. John was alive and he was able to talk to him. His heart almost burst out of his ribcage but he kept his face as blank as he could.

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

What if I'm mad about it?

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

You're not mad.

I'm actually pretty sure you're flattered.

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Hey that's not fair

Don't put full stops like that, you know I hate it.

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Who said I was fair in the first place?

;p

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

I'm rolling my eyes so hard I'm not sure I'll ever be able to see again

You tease

 

Roger couldn't help but smile a little to himself. He went straight to poker facing when he saw his mum watching him. He got a little worried when John didn't reply in a few minutes.

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

You okay?

 

He stared at the screen for a while, and sighed discreetly when he saw that John was typing.

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Sorry, I'm back

Had to go to the loo

Can't take the tablet there in case my mum's here

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

No that's fine, I just got worried

I miss you :(

Can we see each other tomorrow?

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

I have my bass class after school, do you think you could meet me there?

Like, I'll meet you in the toilet or something

So my mom doesn't see us, I think she wants to come and get me home when I'm finished so

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Sounds fine to me, when should I meet you there?

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Uh Idk, I start at 4:15pm and stop at 6:30, but my teacher often let me take a break at like... 5:40?

But you have a drum class at that time, don't you?

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Yeah but it's fine, I'll tell them I badly have to pee. Or that I have stomach flu ;)

 

He knew John was rolling his eyes right now, but he couldn't help imagining his cute face while doing so.

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Alright then, but I won't be able to keep you updated since I won't be able to keep your tablet with me or have wifi down there

So if you don't see me don't wait for too long, okay?

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Yeah okay

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Promise me

 

Roger sighed and rolled his eyes in turn, John already knew him too well to know he was absolutely stubborn.

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Okay, I won't wait for too long if I don't see you

 

They talked a little more, then Roger had to go to bed, so they talked again until John told him he was starting to fall asleep, and the blond wished he could fall asleep in his arms. Now the memory felt bittersweet in his head.

 

 - - -

 

The next day, Roger claimed that he had to go to the toilet less than an hour into his drums class. His teacher, a woman he thought was kind but strict when needed, looked at him just to be sure he wasn't lying. Roger was known to disobey or make jokes, but he was very fond of learning to play the drums so she let him go.

"Okay, then you'll take your break now if you don't mind. We still have much to do today. You did rather well until now, so I'd love to try a new kind of rhythm with you."

Roger smiled widely, he loved when she said that because it meant he'd improved in playing. He nodded and went out of the room light hearted. He hoped he would find John in the toilet. He made his way there and smiled to himself when he walked past the exact place he'd met John for the first time. He remembered well:

He'd been walking in the corridor, reading a paper and thus not paying attention to the world around him, and he'd stumbled upon a wire, falling face first, almost knocking his head over a box -which he would later describe as an amp.

"Are you okay?" a concerned voice had asked, and then he'd felt a hand on his shoulder.

"Yeah, I guess," Roger had said, getting up, hoping no one had seen that, because it was definitely embarrassing.

"I'm sorry, I thought the wire was visible enough where it was," the boy had said, apparently excessively worried.

Roger had wanted to tell him that he was the one not paying attention, but he instead asked something else: "you go to my school, don't you? I think I saw you there."

The boy had looked at him with pure confusion, but then confirmed it, "yeah, now that you say it, I think I saw your face in the past..."

Roger had smiled brightly and raised his hand in order to shake hands, "I'm Roger."

"John," the brunet had smiled shyly, relieved.

Roger reached the toilet after a turn to the right, he was disappointed not to fin John here. He was a little early though. He smiled back awkwardly at a woman who exited the place and waited here. Another woman went in, and a man, and Roger wasn't really paying attention, on his phone, leaning against the wall in the corner, until a hand appeared, hiding his screen. He shot his head up and smiled.

"Hi," he said kindly. He was answered by a quick peck from John. "How are you doing?"

"I'm happy to see you!" John replied, apparently as excited as he sounded, "how are you?"

"Just as fine, apparently," the blond smiled kindly, pushing John into a stall gently, "let's get some privacy."

John didn't contest it and followed him there, almost instantly crushing against Roger to kiss him properly. The blond certainly wasn't going to complain about how messy the kiss was, he missed that way too much.

They heard the door open and close several times, but none of them paid much attention. Making up for lost time felt like the best idea right now.

When John was almost sure no one else was in the room, he parted a little, not letting go of Roger's hold though.

"We should go back," he whispered half heartedly.

"Yeah... I've been here for a while now,  Ms Posel's gonna hate me. She told me we'd go a step further when I come back," he said, John could hear pride in his voice.

"Oh yeah? That's great then! I hope I'll be able to hear that soon enough!" the brunet replied excitedly.

"Me too, it's been a while since your last presentation. Well, mine too but I think I have one next month."

"Hmm I don't know if there's anything planned for bass players soon, so I'll just wait 'till Mister Rowen tells me there's something happening."

They shared another rather long kiss.

"We really have to go now," John groaned before opening the door and stepping outside the stall.

Roger followed him half heartedly, "when will I be able to see you again?"

"We'll try tomorrow, at school, I'll talk to you tonight if I can," the brunet answered, kissed his cheek hurriedly and exited the room.

The blond left a minute after, and he was welcomed back into the room with a little scold from his teacher. He still was glad because he managed to impress her by doing a great job with the new stuff she wanted to teach him. He was all happy when he left the room, he couldn't wait to tell his parents when they got home from work.

His happiness was thrown away when he left the building and walked down the stairs of the conservatory. That's where he crossed eyes with John's mother. He was glad his boyfriend wasn't there, he wondered what got him so late though, he hoped it wasn't anything bad, he probably was having a talk with someone in there.

He tried not to pay too much attention to Mrs Deacon, but he could feel her gaze on his until he was out of reach. He shuddered from head to toes when he felt safe again, realizing he'd been holding his breath. He couldn't imagine how it would feel to have a mother like that. He was usually upset about his mom wanting to know everything about his life, but he gladly preferred that. He felt pained for John once more and was now only looking forward to talking to him later, hoping that they would be able to do so.

 

\- - - 

 

They had been able to talk a little that night, and so they found a way to meet each other at school. They were able to eat together, John's mom would never know that, right? Roger thought his boyfriend was a little distant though, and he hated that.

"Is there something wrong?" he finally asked after putting his fork down, watching the brunet closely.

John frowned after a moment and shook his head, "no, the usual. Why are you asking?"

"There is something bothering you, what happened?"

"Rog there's nothing going on, I'm just a little stressed out... I just don't know how to make this work, plus my mom made it clear I shouldn't see you..."

The blond pouted a little, "hey you're the one who says you hate when I keep things from you, it's the same for me you know."

"Rog..." the brunet started and then sighed a little, biting the inside of his cheek, "I might not be able to see you tomorrow," he finally said, trying not to look too worried.

"Why not? Nothing happened when we did yesterday, plus our music classes overlap perfectly this time, so it's perfect really, why would anything go wrong?"

John didn't reply and looked down at his food for a moment, until his boyfriend's foot gently pushed his several times. He finally raised his eyes at him, the blond shrugging and waiting for an explanation.

"She saw you yesterday, apparently," he started slowly, and it was enough for Roger to freeze in place, "she had forgotten that you also went to the conservatory, so she wants to make sure I'm not seeing you there too..."

"But it's so disrespectful to you," the older boy said, frankly starting to get angry now, "John she doesn't have the right to make you quit over some dumb shit like us cuddling!" he lowered his voice when he saw a few heads turning toward them, "I mean, you can't let her have total control over your life, what is it going to be next? Find you another school?"

The way John withdrew physically, circling his waist with his arms, made Roger want to scream. He couldn't let that happen, he was hurting from seeing his boyfriend suffering like that, it all felt so unfair, especially for John. He wasn't even sure it was legal to treat your kid like that.

"John... I'm sorry I maybe overreacted a little... But she can't control you like that, she can't keep you from going to a school you like or worse, keep you from playing your bass. It's purely evil, I'm not sure how I can help but you can't let her do that..."

"It's... Rog, it's my mom you're talking about... And as much as I hate this situation, you wouldn't like it if I was talking about your mom like you do with mine," John replied, his voice shaking a little.

"But you have to realize this is not normal... Please do talk about it with your bass teacher at least. Find a way to go tomorrow, I'll keep a low profile if you need me to so she won't see me or... I don't fucking know but you're gonna get hurt in the way if we don't act now..." Roger said, he was almost desperate now, he just wanted to cross the table and hug his boyfriend until better days came around again.

"I'll... Maybe talk to Mister Rowen yeah... If I can, I don't know..." the younger boy mumbled, looking everywhere but at the blond, "can we get out of here?" he asked, glancing quickly at his boyfriend, he too, needed some time with him.

So they got out of the canteen and searched for a quiet place in the park. It was a sunny day despite still being winter, and it was surprisingly warm, so most of the students were outside. They still found a place to sit in the grass behind a tree just to have a little privacy.

They sat there in silence for a while, Roger holding the younger boy, and the latter playing with grass, his head settled against the blond's collarbone and chin. They didn't feel like talking; John was trying to escape his thoughts as much as possible, and Roger was searching for a way to start the conversation again. He finally thought going straight to the point probably was the best way.

"John, you're not thinking about us breaking up, are you?"

The brunet wished he never thought about it, but the idea came running back in his head sometimes, it was the easiest situation after all, so they would both be out of any problem.

"Because I don't want to break up with you," the blond finally continued softly, holding him a little tighter, "but you thought about it, obviously..." he said, but his voice surprisingly did not sound like he was blaming John for it.

"I uh... I did think about it but... Because it would be the easiest way and... But I don't want to lose you.." he sighed, tearing and crumpling some grass in his hands nervously, "I don't know what else to do..."

Roger nodded slightly, "do you think... Do you think you'd be able to go on like that for a while? Until we figure something out? If anything goes wrong we can still talk to someone, right?"

"Who?" the younger boy asked, straightening up to look at him, "I don't want to talk about it with anybody."

"I don't know, someone at school?" Roger saw his boyfriend wince and tried to think about something else, "at the conservatory?" he was still welcomed with a negative answer, "my parents? The police?"

"Rog," John suddenly said, apparently quite offended now, "I don't want your parent to judge my mom, and certainly not the police!"

"Sorry," Roger whispered, out of ideas. He bit his bottom lip with regret, "I only said that because I care about you."

The brunet sighed heavily and anyone would have been able to read the full extent of his emotions, because it showed on his face for a minute just how bad and sad and scared he felt. Roger felt his heart drop and his guts cramp up, and he felt the urge to protect his boyfriend from the world. He couldn't do that though, and it pained him way too much. He grabbed the boy's arm to get his attention and shook it a little.

"Look John, it's probably not the best time to say it, but I need you to know that I love you, okay? I mean it."

The brunet looked up at him, shyly first, not reacting in any way. It was only his expression that betrayed the confusion and the amount of mixed emotions he was battling with right now.

Roger felt the need to say it again, just to make sure his boyfriend understood, "I love you," he said, looking at him in the eyes.

"Rog I... I uh..." the younger boy finally said, his voice sweating with nervousness, looking away for a second before getting back to look at him, "I mean... Me too, I guess? Or... That is... I'm quite sure..."

The blond smiled at him in the brightest way John had ever saw him smile. He felt a little better just at that sight. Roger had told him he loved him two or three times already, but this one just felt so sincere -not that the previous times weren't, but he just hadn't been a hundred percent sure about all of this before- that John almost melted right here. He took the blond in his arms, holding him tight.

"I love you too Rog," he said, and even if the sound came muffled because the boy had basically said that against his shoulder, Roger couldn't help but feel like the happiest person in the world.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there!  
> I've been away for... Quite a while, I'm sorry! I had so much to do and consequently had 0 time to write ahhhh. But now, instead of revising for my exams, I am providing you with this chapter. I hope you'll love it ;)
> 
> Btw, I just wanted to say again that I completely came up with the other characters that are in this fic (which means everyone except the actual Queen members). So they have nothing to do with their irl family members or such things.  
> Also, thank you Havvy (DeHavilland) for being my super beta!

A week or so passed in the same way: John and Roger tried to find ways to see each other whenever they could, being extra careful with who could see them. John felt like he couldn't trust anyone, what if his mom called and asked if he was still spending time with Roger? What if, not aware of the situation, a supervisor told her that they were still friends? John tried not to think about it too much when he was with the blond because he wanted to make the most of the little time they were able to spend together. As soon as he was on the way home, though, the anxiety always begun to claim ownership over his brain and he couldn't think straight. He was really starting to fear coming home after class, and even if he tried to walk slower, he couldn't avoid having to go home at last.

Every time he was with his mother, he behaved the same way: not talking much except when she was talking to him, not replying when she asked him about the 'horrible boy that kind of looked like a girl and who tried to drag her son into illegal things' because it hurt hearing his own mom, almost the only family member he had, despising what John loved and cared about. It hurt knowing he didn't have any support. He’d barely had any his whole life, if he was being honest with himself, and as much as he should love his mother because, well, it was his mother, his family, his DNA, he was starting to hate her and fear her in a way that shouldn't be.

That day felt like any other day. He came home a little late because he took his time on the way from the bus stop, and he was welcomed by his mom asking him what took him so long. She did not speak in a necessarily harsh voice, but John could still feel himself shivering. He told her that the bus was a little late because of a slight traffic jam and she did not ask more about it, she just eyed him cautiously and went on with the dishes.

When John wanted to go to his room, he was stopped in the middle of the stairs.

"Where do you think you're going, young man?" his mother asked, and he gulped.

"I was... I was going to do my homework...?" He said, which he was actually going to do in a few minutes.

"Why don't you work on that here instead? It's been a while since I made sure everything is done in the right way."

John suddenly feared she had discovered the tablet, or something else. He inhaled. "Sure."  
  
He went to his room to grab his things, checking his hiding place, but the tablet was still here, untouched. He sighed in relief and took his things before joining his mother in the kitchen, keeping his head down. He sat quietly and started going through what he had to do. He stayed silent; he felt his mom's eyes on him a few times. Oh, she could keep an eye on him, John was still a great student, he did what he could to have good grades. His mother was strict about his work at school but she couldn't really complain, so he was fine with that most of the time.  
  
"I have to go to the store now," his mom suddenly said, almost making him jump, "don't do anything foolish while I'm not home."

John raised his head to look at her and nodded, busying himself right away. He heard his mother take what she needed and leave. He kept working for a few minutes until he couldn't take it anymore.

He didn't really think about it, but when the idea popped into his mind, it just felt like the craziest, yet most appropriate, thing to do. He stood up, methodically took his books, went to his room and put them in their place. Next, he went to his mother's room, but he couldn't find his phone. He let out a groan out of frustration. Now he felt like nothing could make him change his mind. She wanted him to have zero connection with the world around them? _Alright_. He went back to his room again, walking up the stairs with a firm step. He picked up his school bag, emptied it, collected the things he cared about the most and stuffed them in said bag. He still wasn't thinking, every move felt automatic, like his whole body agreed with his mind, and he had no control over it. He stopped in the middle of his packing to collect the tablet.

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Can we see each other?

 

He sent it to Roger and stared at the screen for a whole minute before adding:

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Like, right now?

 

Since he got no answer straight away, he went back to packing his things. He eyed his bass in its case, laying in the corner of the room. He definitely couldn't leave his bass behind. He bit his lip and walked toward it and then placed it on his bed. He noticed the notification light going on and off on the tablet and he half jumped on it.

 

**@DrumDrumRoger**

I guess?

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

Where can I meet you?

Somewhere hidden

 

He waited impatiently, watching the three dots that said Roger was typing.

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

I'm nearly done at the conservatory

 

**@BassBassDeaky**

I can't meet you there

 

**@DrumDrumRog**

Okay then...

Meet me at mine? I think my parents won't be home for at least 2h

Like, wait for me in the hall, there's a nook for the mailboxes, you can wait for me here, no one'll see you

 

John didn't wait any longer. He typed a last message to his boyfriend who sent him the code to enter his building, took his bag and bass, locked his door from the outside with a screwdriver, hoping his mom wouldn't notice he had gone too quickly, and left the house, closing the front door behind him. He walked to the bus stop and waited for a while. It was when the bus actually arrived that doubt started rushing through his body. He tried to put his thoughts aside and stepped on the bus, walking to a free seat. He bit his bottom lip and stared into space for the whole journey and when he got off the bus, he walked straight to Roger's building. He made his way inside thanks to the code Roger had given him and went to put his bag and case on the floor. He leaned against the corner made by the wall and the start of the row of mailboxes and waited nervously, biting his lips once again. He heard a few people crossing the hall, but no one saw him, or they just didn't care. He played with a thread that was coming out of his sleeve for a while, and suddenly his boyfriend appeared in front of him.

"John?" the blond said, but he wasn't able to say anything else because the younger boy had already made his way into his arms, hiding his face in his neck.

Roger held him for a little while, his hands gently stroking his boyfriend's back. He wanted John to calm down a little first.

"Are you okay?" he finally asked, trying to keep his voice as soft as he could and he didn't have to try so hard, he was worried.

John nodded at first, then let out a rather big sigh, and finally spoke: "I think I just did something a bit dumb..." he mumbled.

Roger was going to ask him what it was when he noticed the brunet's bag and guitar case. John wasn't the kind to take his bass with him if he didn't mean to use it, and Roger was pretty sure he didn't have any class or any other thing where his bass would be useful. He frowned a little and asked anyway: "What is it?"

"I uhm... It's... I think I ran away...?" the younger boy tried, now feeling absolutely ashamed of what he had done. He felt stuck between the two choices he had: go home or do everything but go home. If his mom had already discovered the fact that he’d left, he would definitely be in for a rough time. His stomach twisted little out of fear. "I can't go home..."

The blond took a minute to understand the whole meaning of that but before he could ask any questions or even react, John had started sobbing quietly against him.

"Oh no, John, baby, I'm here now, I won't leave you alone okay?" Roger said, holding him even tighter, rocking him by stepping from one foot to another.

John kept sobbing for a while and finally spoke again, "It's... It was the dumbest thing to do, now I’ve messed up completely..." he said with a barely audible voice; Roger heard, thankfully.

"No, you did what you thought was right at the moment, you probably had your reasons. It's okay that you don't want this kind of life anymore, I know we're not 18 yet, but you're not a kid anymore, and she doesn't have any say on what you're willing to do with your life. Only you know what you want."

It seemed to help the brunet a little since his sobs were a little weaker by the end of Roger's explanation. He sniffed quite desperately.

"But I- I can't go home now, I have nowhere to go, and I didn't want to bring you into all that..."

"John, listen to me, if you didn't ask me for help I would have found a way to end up in trouble in order to help you anyway, you know that, don't you?"

The brunet nodded slightly and dried his face with his sleeves. Roger stroked his cheek.

"Let me make sure that no one's home, I suppose you have to be extra careful, and I'll have you inside until I find a plan okay?"

John nodded and felt really cold the moment Roger left him to climb the stairs. He stayed right at the same spot, his body half trembling, some tears still running down his cheeks. He felt like a mess. He was probably one. And he was probably messing with Roger's life **,** too. He probably was the dumbest boy on earth, he was hurting everyone he cared about; well, now he barely had anyone except Roger. He felt so lonely and useless.

He realized he was sobbing again when he heard his boyfriend call his name. He hid his face in his hands until someone - well, Roger- gripped his wrists and pulled him a little forward.

"Come on, we'll find a solution, I promise. I'm not letting you down," the blond said with a firm but still soft voice. The boy had a burning fire inside, he was so angry that his boyfriend had to face all of this. Deep down, he also was terribly scared, but he wasn't going to tell John about that.

Roger grabbed his boyfriend's bag and gave him his guitar case. He gripped his wrist and pulled him behind himself. He closed the door behind them and went to put John's things in his room.

"Do you want anything to eat or drink?" he asked, looking at the brunet who was standing here awkwardly.

"I'm not really hungry," John replied under his breath.

"How about a hot chocolate?" the older boy tried, and he smiled widely when John agreed with that.

Roger made them both hot chocolate and decided they would be cosier in his room - also just in case his parents got home earlier than expected. They sat on the blond's bed and sipped their drink without saying a word. Roger was only stroking his boyfriend's hand every now and then, or his knee. He could tell John had calmed down by now, even if he still looked kind of upset.

"What do you say about a nap?" The blond asked quietly, tilting his head on the side.

John looked up to watch him for a while, he was exhausted indeed. He just wasn't sure what to do next.

"I won't let you sleep for too long if you want, so we can discuss your options then," the older boy tried, hoping the brunet wouldn't know Roger would never wake him up if he was sleeping too peacefully.

John finally nodded and put his empty mug on the bedside table before crawling up to his boyfriend and settling against his chest. For a moment he felt like he could almost forget about all of this. The blond was stroking his hair quietly, kissing his forehead from time to time, he was warm, he didn't feel as lonely as he'd felt earlier. He drifted off rather quickly.

 

 - - - 

 

Roger's mind was rushing. He had to find a way to help John, he couldn't let his boyfriend deal with everything while he would mind his own business. He kept playing with the brunet's hair, occasionally his ear, thinking hard. He frowned when an idea came to his mind. He didn't really know if it was a good idea, but he could maybe give it a go? They were in trouble already anyway.

He picked up his phone after searching for it in the middle of the sheets and bit his bottom lip.

 

**To: Freddie Mercury**

Hey Fred, I'm sorry to bother you but didn't you say you had a spare room in your flat?

 

He let his head lie against John's, waiting for an answer. He scrolled through his phone in the meantime, trying not to let stress take over him completely. Finally, his phone vibrated in his hand and a notification popped up. He clicked on it.

 

**From: Freddie Mercury**

Yeah, did you find anyone who could be interested in having 2 fabulous roommates?

 

**To: Freddie Mercury**

Not for the long term but

Could you actually do me a favour?

 

He was going to try and explain the situation to his friend when his phone vibrated again from a call. He smiled slightly when the picture he had for Freddie's contact appeared on his screen, the man was sticking his tongue out and making a funny face. Roger moved away from his boyfriend, covering the brunet so he wouldn't feel the cold after he left, and finally answered the call.

"Hey," he said, closing the door behind him and walking to the kitchen so he wouldn't wake John up.

"Hello darling, so what are you asking for exactly?" Freddie replied with a singing voice.

"You know that I have a boyfriend," Roger started quietly.

"I do, how wouldn't I know, you talk about him all the damn time," the older man teased him.

"Shut up," the blond said, and he was cut off before he could complete what he wanted to say.

"That's a rude way to ask a friend for help, dear," Freddie replied, his voice still joyful.

Roger wanted to tell him to shut up again but only rolled his eyes, "just listen to me, so I have this boyfriend and, you know, my parents don't know about us, his mom... Doesn't really agree with us being together and, well, I thought that, maybe-"

"Just go straight to the point, I don't understand a word you're saying."

"Yeah, well, I thought you could help me and lend us the spare room so we could have a little privacy?" the blond asked, hoping he didn't sound too desperate, "if you need to, I'll pay."

Freddie took a minute to think about it before he spoke again: "Yeah, I suppose we could agree on something, darling, just let me ask Brian if he's okay with it, would you?"

"Thank you." Roger sighed out of relief. "Uh, actually, do you think you could ask him before tonight?"

"Are you in such a rush to get laid?" Freddie huffed a laugh, "oh I wish I was a teenager again... I'll see what I can do, I'll keep you updated as soon as I know, darling."

"Thank you, Fred, I'll owe you one."

"Sure," the older man chuckled before hanging up.

Roger sighed heavily when he put his phone down. He didn't really ask Freddie for how long John could stay, but he'd have a talk with him soon, hopefully. For now, he potentially had a solution. He felt the weight on his shoulders dissipating a little. He waited for a while before going back to his room where the brunet was still sleeping heavily. He smiled and looked at him for a while, there was no noise around, it was calm. He relaxed a bit for the first time since John's message earlier that afternoon.

Apparently, luck was on their side for now. He got a text from Freddie who told him it was okay for them to come for the night -'or more if you need to have several rounds this week ;)'. The blond rolled his eyes but chuckled quietly, John was going to be alright. Now he only had to convince his parents so he could sleep over at Freddie and Brian's, too. He bit his lip, he'd write them a note and tell them he went out to a concert they agreed he could attend a few weeks ago and a friend offered to let him sleep at his flat since it was right next to the theatre. He had done that in the past, and he often talked about concerts with them, they probably wouldn't find it strange. He'd maybe earn a little scolding tomorrow after school, but that was worth it, he thought.

He didn't want to waste time now, his parents could come back home anytime now. He stroked John's cheek and called his name. The boy moved a little away.

"Babe, we have to go, I found you a safe place for tonight," he whispered.

"Hm..." John mumbled, his voice not awoken a bit, "where?"

"I think I already told you about these friends I occasionally go to concerts with, I told you that you should meet them. Well they agreed to have us for tonight, they have a spare room in their flat and they can't find another roommate for now. I could probably ask them if it's fine to have you there a little more."

John shifted on his back and looked at him with sleepy eyes. "Are you sure there's no problem for them?"

"They're great people, I'm sure you'll like them," Roger said with a smile. He knew it could take a little while for people to get used to Brian and Freddie, but if he had to choose who his best friend was, he'd probably answer with their names. "They're a little older than us though, I hope it's fine with you?"

"Older? How much older?" John asked with a puzzled expression on his face.

"Not that much older," the blond chuckled, "just a few years, I think Freddie's in last year of uni or something, maybe not last year, well I have no clue, I just know him and Brian are at uni, so they live on the other side of the city."

The younger boy nodded and Roger told him to wake up properly so they could go. The blond searched in his wardrobe for a whole minute before handing him a cap.

"Here, so you'll be less recognizable in the street."

He then left the room and wrote a note for his parents, leaving it on the kitchen table. He could leave them a text, but there was a slight risk that they'd forbid him to have another sleepover on a school day.

John joined him in the kitchen with his bag and case. Roger packed whatever he needed for the night and the day after, and they left. The blond felt a soft kick on his side while he was locking the front door. He turned his head to his boyfriend who pointed down the stairs. He froze when he saw his dad starting to walk up to their floor. Roger panicked a little and made the brunet go upstairs quickly. Then, he acted like he was going down the stairs himself.

"Oh **,** hi **,** dad," he said, trying to sound like he normally did.

"Hello **,** Rog, where are you going at this time of the day?"

"Oh **,** uh, I left you a note, you know I have this concert tonight, I can't miss it."

His father raised one eyebrow, "I don't think you told me about that one."

Roger had to make up a story quickly: "I don't remember talking about it with you either this past week, but I'm sure I did, like, a few weeks ago, so maybe you forgot. And mom said I could go."

Mr **.** Taylor shrugged, "fine then, have fun and tell us when it's finished so we know when to expect you home."

"Oh, yeah, speaking about that... The friends I go to the concert with asked me if I'd like to sleep at their flat... Since it's on the other side of town. Can I go? I took my school things for tomorrow, and I did my homework."

His dad eyed him carefully and Roger was only hoping he wouldn't say no, but thankfully, it went well for him.

"Fine, I hope you won't prove me wrong to let you go there by having bad grades, then."

"I'll try my best," Roger said. He wasn't the best student, but not the worst either. He smiled widely, "bye dad, tell mom I'll be fine."

Mr. Taylor shook his head with a slight smile and went in. Roger continued walking down the stairs until he was sure his father wouldn't see John. He waved to his boyfriend who quickly met him at the bottom of the stairs. The blond smiled at him with a victorious grin, adjusting the younger boy's cap on his head. He thought John was absolutely cute like that.

They walked to the next bus stop going in the right direction, Roger typed a message to Freddie asking if they could all eat together in order to get to know each other a little, knowing the art student would jump on the occasion to worm out every piece of information he could get on him and John being together. Freddie was like that, he loved to learn and gossip about his friends, and tease them, most of the time. He could picture Brian rolling his eyes already.

Freddie didn't take long to reply saying he couldn't wait to meet John and that he was okay with them eating at their flat. Roger was glad he had these friends.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So here we are..... No way to go back in time for John now.  
> Don't hesitate to tell me what you thought of this chapter! Also if you have any idea of what's going to happen (I do have a lot of things figured out (thank you Lasthoso ;p) but I'd love to know what you think about John's future ;))
> 
> Have a great day :D


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello,  
> It's been a (long) while. Oops. Forgive me. I'm back now, I'll try not to disappear for months again.........  
> Once again, I could never thank Havvy enough for taking the time to beta this chapter like a pro ♥ it means a lot  
> If people are still interested in reading this, I hope you enjoy! Now I'm leaving you with the Freddie and Brian introduction ;)

Roger rang the intercom at Freddie and Brian's building entrance several times, John waiting patiently at his side, before someone answered.

"Will you ever stop doing that, darling," Freddie said through the intercom.

"That way you know it's me right away!" Roger told him excitedly.

"Yeah, well, we weren't expecting anyone else, you know. Anyway, come inside, dear."

The door buzzed and the blond gently pushed John inside. He had noticed how his boyfriend seemed to get progressively more anxious as they approached his friends' flat. Roger grabbed the younger boy's arm before he could start walking up the stairs.

"Hey," he said quietly, "it's gonna be fine. I trust them. Just... Don't mind Freddie being a little indiscreet, it's how he is. He's the kindest otherwise. Also, Brian can seem a bit cold at first, but he's a great lad, too. They're probably the best friends I have," he explained, hoping it would reassure John.

The brunet nodded and smiled anxiously, leaning a little into Roger's touch. The blond kissed his cheek and hugged him for a second, maybe that would help comfort him?

"Plus I'll be here with you tonight."

They parted again. John grabbed his boyfriend's hand in his as they started walking up the stairs. They quickly arrived at the third floor, just in time for Freddie to throw the door open.

"Oh, there you are! I was starting to think you got lost in the stairs," the older boy squealed.

John discreetly eyed his boyfriend, not knowing what to say or do. Thankfully, Roger didn't seem bothered at all as he let go of John's hand and went to hug Freddie. He pulled back quickly and smiled.

"Hey, Fred, so here's John, my boyfriend," the blond said joyfully, with a little pride in his tone and to the way he puffed out his chest.

"Welcome, dear," the man said, "well, come in!"

They followed Freddie inside the flat, John bringing up the rear.

"He looks even better in real life," the older man whispered to Roger.

The blond giggled and shrugged, "What were you expecting from me?"

John blushed a little, grateful everyone seemed to have forgotten him for the moment. He usually wasn’t keen on having all the attention on him, especially in a new situation where he felt vulnerable.

"Hi," came a voice on the younger boy's right, making him jump a little. "Oh, sorry, didn't mean to scare you."

John turned his head to meet a face surrounded by dark curly hair. He blinked several times. "N-no, it's fine, I wasn't paying attention, that's all."

The curly-haired man smiled at him politely, "I'm Brian, Freddie's roommate."

"Oh, yeah, well... I'm John," the younger boy said, hoping he didn't sound too awkward.

"I would've been surprised if you weren't."

John smiled anxiously at him. Thankfully, his boyfriend was at his side in a second.

"Hey, Brian, how are things going?"

John watched them as they talked for a moment. He noticed how Roger didn't give the man a hug and he wondered why for a second. They left their bags and John’s guitar case on the floor before they settled in the living room then, John sat on the sofa next to his boyfriend.

"So, what are you doing in life, John?" Brian asked.

"I, uh..." John started, thinking about what to say, "I'm in my second year of high school."

"Oh, so like Roger?"

"Yeah, but we're not in the same class."

"I see," Brian said.

"And uhm... What are you two doing?"

"I'm studying astrophysics," the curly-haired replied before looking at Freddie.

"I'm in art studies, dear," the older man said, "do you have any idea of what you'd like to do later?"

"I think... Probably electronics or something like that."

Freddie nodded, "Well, that's great."

John shifted a little uncomfortably when no one spoke for a while. The older one of them all finally spoke again, and the brunet let out a discreet sigh.

"So, what brings you two here, really?"

It didn't help much with John's anxiety. He really wasn’t comfortable with the fact that he felt like he was abusing Roger’s friends trust. He opened his mouth, not so sure of what to say, but thankfully Roger replied before he did.

"You know why, Fred, besides, I thought it'd be a great opportunity to introduce John to you. Maybe we can all go to concerts together," the blond said easily, as if he was very comfortable with this situation, John thought.

The younger boy didn't have much room to think about what Roger had told his friend, because the latter replied right away.

"Oh, yeah, by the way, I saw a poster for a festival not far away from here, we could go, don't you think?" Freddie asked, suddenly, his tone getting overly excited. "Do you like music, John?"

"He plays the bass, I think," Brian said quietly, his eyes travelling from his roommate to John.

"I-I do, indeed," John stuttered, realizing his boyfriend must have talked about him to his friends.

"Oh, you're right, I think Roger told us about it."

"He did. Also, I still remember his panicked texts saying 'oh shit guys I just bumped – literally - in **to** the cutest boy in town, he plays the bass, I think that’s a sign, what should I do?'" Brian quoted, imitating a freaked-out Roger, although not letting his tone reveal what he thought.

"I remember that," Freddie replied with a smirk, "well, that was a great time."

"Speak for yourselves," the blond complained, "you kept making fun of me!"

John didn't know if he wanted to hide under a rock or ask Roger about this. He only knew that he'd met the blond again several times after their first encounter and now he couldn’t help but wonder if this had anything to do with the two men advising him. Either way, he could feel his face was flushed.

"Well, you were fun to watch, darling!" Freddie retorted, "you wanted to do it right so badly, it was fun to see you panic a bit."

"Such great friends you are..." Roger said, rolling his eyes, "you were happy to be invested in my love life, because you’re eternally single."

Brian snorted in his chair and Freddie sent the blond a warning glare. John still felt very uneasy about this, he didn't really know how the older man would react, hoping they weren't going to fight. He realized he was overthinking all of this when Freddie laughed in turn, Roger following.

"Fair enough, darling... Fair enough. But,” he emphasized, “you should thank me for coaching you, without me you'd never have gotten him," the older man said, pointing at John but still looking at Roger.

"Like you're the one that made it happen," the blond replied, rolling his eyes again, "I was the one who did the hard work, not you!"  

John watched them teasing each other for a while, Brian sometimes arguing or adding details.

"Guys, I think John would better like a conversation he could take part in."

Roger turned his head to his boyfriend and grabbed his hand, suddenly feeling bad for forgetting him in all his bickering with his friends. John offered him a little smile.

"Oh my god, they're at that point where they can talk with their eyes," Freddie squeaked. 

Brian shook his head and stood up, "I should go and prepare dinner. Fred, show the flat to John," he said, hoping this would do the trick to distract his roommate.

The older man stood up as well, "sure, follow me!"

Roger helped his boyfriend get on his feet and went after his friend, John following them down the small corridor.

"So, here's the bathroom," the dark-haired man said, opening the door and moving his arm in the air to show them. He stepped back and pointed out another door, "here's Brian's room, mine's the one next to it. And here," he explained, opening the last door, "is our spare room. Just don't mind about all the stuff here, we use it more as a closet. It's clean, though."

John smiled quietly at Freddie, nodding his head to show him his gratefulness. He missed the obvious look and smirk the dark-haired man gave to Roger, the latter widening his eyes and rolling them.

"I'm gonna fetch our things in here," John mumbled, leaving them to go and collect his bag and guitar case. He also took his boyfriend's bag. He stopped before turning back into the corridor when he heard the two friends talking quietly.

"So, how long do you think you'll stay here?" the older man asked.

"I don't really know... I don't want to overstay, but..."

"Don't you think your or John's parents will get angry if you're not home?"

"Oh, John only has his mom and they're not really on good terms, so it's fine. I think I'll need to get back home at some point... Would you mind if he stayed here for a while?" Roger asked carefully.

"Listen, I know you told me you were coming here to have alone time with your boyfriend, but this is getting a bit strange, I hope you're not putting yourself in trouble. Anyway, he can stay as long as he needs to, I guess."

"Thank you," the blond breathed out, "I told you, I can pay if you need me to."

"Rog, I'm not going to make you pay for this. It's a spare room. There's no one paying for it on a daily basis anyway."

"But... If he eats with you...?"

"Let it go, it's fine. If it becomes a problem, we'll find a way. We'll keep him hostage until you pay the ransom."

John heard them laugh and decided it was a great time to come back in, handing Roger his bag. The blond almost immediately dropped it on the bedroom floor as John sat on the bed.

"I'll leave you alone for now, darlings, but I think we'll be eating soon," Freddie said, closing the door. He opened it again, slipping his head in the gap. "Oh, by the way, please don't make too much noise, or we'll have to face an angry Brian. And you don't want to face an irritated Brian because you made too much noise. So keep it quiet, please." This time, he closed the door and walked away.

John looked at the door for a moment. He then turned his head to face his boyfriend.

"So, what do you think of them?" Roger asked.

"I think they're... Fine?" the brunet whispered his reply.

"Oh, you'll get used to them in no time, I'm sure. They can seem a bit weird at first glance, but I promise they're the best."

John smiled slightly and spoke again, keeping his voice low, "I suppose I'll get to know them then."

The blond frowned. "Why are you whispering?"

"I thought... Freddie said to keep quiet...?" John replied, not sure if he was meant to whisper or not now.

Roger watched him with a blank face for a second until he couldn't stop a chuckle from slipping out of his lips. "Oh no, he wasn't talking about that kind of noise, John..."

The younger boy blinked at him obliviously, a little lost with what his boyfriend meant **.** "Oh," he said, suddenly blushing hard, "wait, what did you tell him?"

Roger panicked a little. He couldn't tell John that he'd told Freddie they needed the room to... Have some interesting time alone. "Just that we had nowhere to be alone together and you weren't on best terms with your mom. Nothing else. He's just... Freddie."

John sighed and let himself fall on his back on top of the bed. "Now they're gonna believe we're using their room to do weird things..."

The blond sprawled on the bed belly first, his head turned to see his boyfriend. "Was it weird?" he asked softly.

John looked at him and blinked, "what do you mean?"

"I mean, last time. Was it weird? Do you think it was weird?"

The brunet thought for a moment before speaking again: "a little... But I liked it **,** if that's what you meant."

Roger smiled fondly and watched him for a while. "You know, they wouldn't mind if we did it again here. They'd only be jealous that I get to do that with the sexiest boyfriend."

John blushed and chuckled at the same time, "are they both gay, too?"

"Freddie is. Brian... I don't really know. I don't even know if he knows that himself to be honest."

The younger boy nodded, "how did you meet them? I know you told me about them in the past, but I'm not sure if you've told me how you met."

Roger slid his hand on top of the one John's got resting on his tummy, intertwining their fingers. "I went to a concert; it was several months before I met you. This summer, I think. They wouldn't let me in because I wasn't eighteen, and I made quite a fuss, telling them stories that I had friends in there. They asked me to tell them to come and get me, but of course I had no friends inside. Freddie came out of nowhere and said I was with him. We stayed together for the night, got on really well and kept going out together after that. A few weeks later, I met Brian because he was going with Fred to another concert. I have to say we didn't really get along right away. He took way more time to open up to me. But then, he did, and we spent quite a few good times together. It's weird, because Freddie and I have many common traits, but Brian is my opposite," he laughed, "I guess they balance each other. But I know they sometimes get on each other's nerves. I saw them argue quite badly one time and if it were me, I'd never have spoken to any friend that told me those kind of things again. They got over it somehow. I've never really argued with them, at least not bad arguments. We pretty much only bicker," he chuckled, squeezing John's hand.

The brunet had listened to him carefully, secretly admiring how the blond's eyes reflected such passion when he spoke about his friends. A part of his brain hoped Roger had the same kind of look on his face when he talked about him. He squeezed his boyfriend's hand back.

The older boy finally looked up to him, his gaze lingering on John's lips. The brunet knew this look and it made him feel all kinds of things every time it happened. He wrapped Roger's arm around his waist and turned to his side to face him. The blond took this as a confirmation and went straight to kiss John's lips. It was a soft one, it lasted a little while. They kept kissing for a while, pecking each other's lips, smiling contentedly at each other. They were so deep in their own bubble that Brian's call almost made them both jump.

"I think it's time to eat, baby," Roger half-whispered, stroking his boyfriend's cheek.

John smiled slightly and nodded. He was still a little scared to face the blond's friends again. He wasn't as great with social interactions as Roger seemed to be. Meeting new people, especially in an awkward situation like this one where he felt like he owed them, had always been a stressful thing for him. He was very grateful his boyfriend was able to spend the night here with him, he would have probably panicked all evening if he had to stay alone. He tried not to think about the fact that he'd be alone tomorrow nonetheless, letting out a little sigh.

"Is everything alright?" Roger asked with a concerned tone in his voice.

John met his eyes and shrugged, "yeah, I'm just a little anxious. I'll be fine."

"Is there any reason? Is it because you don't like them?"

The brunet smiled a little and shook his head, "I don't know them, I can't tell if I like them or not yet."

"John..." the blond said, impressed by John’s perspective you're too pure for this world."

The younger boy chuckled, "what? It’s true. Don't judge a book by its cover," he quoted. "Anyway, it's just that I'm scared they won't like me and... You won't be here if they ask me to leave and... Yeah…"

"I can stay here with you tomorrow, if you want me to."

"No! No, you're going to school. I'd hate myself if you didn't. Also... I feel like we're kinda lying to them...? I mean, my mom will probably be searching for me, what if you get in trouble because of me? That'd be unfair for you and that’s unfair for them."

Roger stroked his cheek again, thinking about this. "If you want to, you can tell them. Or I can tell them."

John sighed heavily, feeling the signs of panic crawling underneath his skin and spreading through his body. "I-I'll think about it... I'm afraid they won't like it..."

The blond tightened his grip around his waist and waited for John to calm down a bit, not saying a word. He knew that, personally, he sometimes only needed to be held, to be reminded he was not alone. Not necessarily with words. He hoped this worked with John, too.

"We should go, or else Brian's gonna kill us for being late."

"Sounds like my mom..." John chuckled, halfway amused.

"Yeah, well, in that case we should hurry!" Roger replied, getting on his feet and pulling his boyfriend beside him.

They walked to the small living room and John told the blond he'd be back, he just needed to go to the restroom. Roger went to sit at the table in front of Freddie.

"Where is our second lovebird?" the man asked.

"Needed a wee," Roger replied, handing his plate for Freddie to fill it. "Also, please don't traumatize him tomorrow."

"Why would we do that?" Freddie asked, seemingly stunned that his friend would even consider it.

"You would do that, Fred, you just don't realize it. Not everyone is comfortable with talking about all kinds of topics. You know what I mean." Brian said, squinting at him.

"I'm..." the older man replied, placing a hand on his chest with a theatrical offended tone. "You should see yourself giving people all kinds of judgmental looks, that's traumatizing. You can’t even see your face when you’re mad at me: you look like an angry owl!"

Roger rolled his eyes, "guys, I'm serious, he's a bit stressed, so play it cool."

The blond saw Freddie shaking his head and saying John would be totally fine with them, but he also saw the way Brian seemed to pay attention to what he had just said.

Finally, John came back and they all started to talk about their shared interest for music. John found out they all had both eclectic and shared tastes. All three of them tried to include the younger boy in their conversations, and John felt a little bit more at ease by the time they reached the end of their dinner.

"Oh, by the way!" Freddie suddenly exclaimed, "John, darling, do you have any allergies?"

The schoolboys both looked at him with uncertainty about where that suddenly came from. Seeing as no one replied, the older man felt like he had to explain what he had in mind.

"Well, if we have to keep him, we need to know," he said, turning to Brian, as if it was obvious.

John felt like hiding under a rock again, but he also was glad him staying for a while didn't seem like a big deal to Freddie. Roger chuckled, that was typical Freddie.

"Fred," Brian started exasperatedly, "what did I just tell you..."

"What?" Freddie replied, "I didn't say anything wrong, did I?"

"You really don't know?"

The older man pursed his lips and squinted, completely oblivious of what he could have said that was so weird to his roommate.

"It's fine," John finally said, "and I don't think I have any allergies, at least not that I know of."

Freddie gave a look at Brian that screamed 'see, I said nothing wrong' that made John smile a little. He was starting to like him.

They watched a funny show on TV after they were done eating, and it became obvious to John that both Freddie and Roger were easily entertained. They kept chuckling and pointing things out, whereas Brian didn't laugh a lot, his face mostly blank. John was still feeling a bit shy, so when he found something funny, he just giggled as softly as he could.

At some point, Brian stretched his arms and yawned.

"Guys, I think I should be going to sleep now."

Freddie turned to him, "did you not sleep last night? It's still fucking early!"

"It's 10, Fred, it can be early for you, but late for others."

Freddie rolled his eyes and concentrated again on the show while Brian left the room. John looked at his boyfriend until the blond finally noticed he was being looked at. He directed his gaze at John, not knowing what was going on.

"I think I'm going to rest, too... But you can stay here with Freddie if you want."

Roger shook his head and sat up. "Fred, we're going to bed, too."

"What? You're leaving me on my own? That's very rude of you!"

The blond slapped his shoulder playfully and stood up, waiting for John to follow.

"Stop that, I'll see you tomorrow."

Freddie shook his head and wished them a good night. John took a quick shower and brushed his teeth, letting Roger get in the bathroom after him. He let himself fall on the bed and sighed heavily.

Roger thought this was a great moment to send a message to his parents, so he wrote about how great the concert was and wished them a good night. When he joined John in their room, the boy already seemed half asleep, all cuddled under the blankets. He climbed onto bed, kissed his cheek and settled next to him.

"'Night," John mumbled, "sorry, I think I'll fall asleep shortly..."

Roger smiled and slid a hand in the younger boy's hair, gently brushing it. "It's alright, get your well-deserved sleep. I love you."

John smiled softly and leaned into his touch. He moved closer, letting Roger's embrace warm him up.  
  



End file.
